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I'm probably the old broad here, but this is funny--
- Thread starter shipscook
- Start date
K
KYHeirloomer
Guest
Ya gotta love it, Nan, even without the cartoon.
another old one, but still funny--
----- Subject: : The post office
There was a man who worked for the Post Office whose job it was to process
all the mail that had illegible addresses.
One day just before Christmas, a letter landed on his desk, simply
addressed in shaky handwriting to "God".
With no other clue on the envelope, he opened the letter and read, "Dear
God, I am an 83 year old widow living on the Social Security. Yesterday
someone stole my purse. It had $100 in it, which was all the money I had in
the world and no pension due until after Christmas. Next week is Christmas
and I had invited two of my friends over for Christmas dinner. Without that
money, I have nothing to buy food with. I have no family to turn to, and
you are my only hope. God; can you please help me?"
The postal worker was really touched, and put a copy of the letter up on
the Staff Notice board, at the main sorting office where he worked.
The letter touched the other mailmen and they all dug into their pockets
and had a whip round. Between them they raised $96.
Using an official franked Post Office envelope, they sent the cash on to
the old lady, and for the rest of the day, all the workers felt a warm glow
thinking of the nice thing they had done.
Christmas came and went. A few days later, another letter simply addressed
to "God" landed in the Sorting Office. Many of the mailmen gathered around
while the letter was opened. It read, "Dear God, How can I ever thank you
enough for what you did for me?
Because of your generosity, I was able to provide a lovely dinner for my
friends. We had a very nice day, and I told my friends of your wonderful
gift - in fact we haven't gotten over it and our Pastor is beside himself
with joy.
By the way, there was $4 missing. I think it must have been those thieving
bas***** at the Post Office.
----- Subject: : The post office
There was a man who worked for the Post Office whose job it was to process
all the mail that had illegible addresses.
One day just before Christmas, a letter landed on his desk, simply
addressed in shaky handwriting to "God".
With no other clue on the envelope, he opened the letter and read, "Dear
God, I am an 83 year old widow living on the Social Security. Yesterday
someone stole my purse. It had $100 in it, which was all the money I had in
the world and no pension due until after Christmas. Next week is Christmas
and I had invited two of my friends over for Christmas dinner. Without that
money, I have nothing to buy food with. I have no family to turn to, and
you are my only hope. God; can you please help me?"
The postal worker was really touched, and put a copy of the letter up on
the Staff Notice board, at the main sorting office where he worked.
The letter touched the other mailmen and they all dug into their pockets
and had a whip round. Between them they raised $96.
Using an official franked Post Office envelope, they sent the cash on to
the old lady, and for the rest of the day, all the workers felt a warm glow
thinking of the nice thing they had done.
Christmas came and went. A few days later, another letter simply addressed
to "God" landed in the Sorting Office. Many of the mailmen gathered around
while the letter was opened. It read, "Dear God, How can I ever thank you
enough for what you did for me?
Because of your generosity, I was able to provide a lovely dinner for my
friends. We had a very nice day, and I told my friends of your wonderful
gift - in fact we haven't gotten over it and our Pastor is beside himself
with joy.
By the way, there was $4 missing. I think it must have been those thieving
bas***** at the Post Office.
S
StickyPirate
Guest
LOL at both of those. Will pass them on to my dad...he's my go-to for jokes.
CanMan
New member
This Alzheimer's Test was developed as a mental age assessment by the School of Psychiatry at Harvard University.
Take your time and see if you can read each line aloud without a mistake.
The average person over 40 years of age cannot do it!
1. This is this cat.
2. This is is cat.
3. This is how cat.
4. This is to cat.
5. This is keep cat.
6. This is an cat.
7. This is old cat.
8. This is fart cat.
9. This is busy cat.
10. This is for cat.
11. This is forty cat.
12. This is seconds cat.
Now go back and read the third word in each line from the top down
Take your time and see if you can read each line aloud without a mistake.
The average person over 40 years of age cannot do it!
1. This is this cat.
2. This is is cat.
3. This is how cat.
4. This is to cat.
5. This is keep cat.
6. This is an cat.
7. This is old cat.
8. This is fart cat.
9. This is busy cat.
10. This is for cat.
11. This is forty cat.
12. This is seconds cat.
Now go back and read the third word in each line from the top down
K
KYHeirloomer
Guest
Well, if we're going to be telling jokes:
Do you know why it's called PMS?
Cuz Mad Cow Disease was already taken.
Do you know why it's called PMS?
Cuz Mad Cow Disease was already taken.
Cook Chatty Cathy
New member
Wooohooo-oooo KYH you're terrible! But I love it mad cow disease:wonderful!!!!!
I love all the jokes, but especially the one about Dear God, thanks for sharing one and all.
CCCathy
P.S. I suggest if ya'all want a really great laugh read MamaM's post in the
"Fried Squash Blossoms" about her disappearing squash blossoms! I loved it!
But I love it mad cow disease:wonderful!!!!!I love all the jokes, but especially the one about Dear God, thanks for sharing one and all.
CCCathy
P.S. I suggest if ya'all want a really great laugh read MamaM's post in the
"Fried Squash Blossoms" about her disappearing squash blossoms! I loved it!
Cook Chatty Cathy
New member
Hi Nan,
I read a good one last night and wanted to pass it on.................
A little boy was reading his big family Bible, when a dried and pressed leaf fell out from the pages. He quickly called out to his Mother "Hey Mom I think Adam's clothes just fell off!"
Hope ya' like it! Cathy
By the way how do you like stuffed grape leaves? They are one of my favorites!
I read a good one last night and wanted to pass it on.................
A little boy was reading his big family Bible, when a dried and pressed leaf fell out from the pages. He quickly called out to his Mother "Hey Mom I think Adam's clothes just fell off!"
Hope ya' like it! Cathy
By the way how do you like stuffed grape leaves? They are one of my favorites!