Turkey Tale

[jglass]

So Jon's Dad bought a turkey hen a few months ago as a companion to a turkey rooster he had. His rooster died a few months ago and since then he has been letting the hen roam loose. She gets her breakfast by the backdoor every morning and then gets her dinner at the backdoor everynight. She chirps and clucks and follows you around the yard. Every time I go and get something from the garden she follows me about four feet away just chirping away and looking at me. She does the same thing to my husbands Dad lol. She has been roosting on the back porch. She is a cute little thing but she acts to me like she is lonesome. I caught myself talking back to her in the garden the other day lol. I was like uh ...if your trying to talk me out of cooking poultry for the holidays it isnt working. She isnt on the menu. She is a pet.

[chubbyalaskagriz]

jainie- won't be long and she'll start slippin recipes for Thanksgiving HAM under your back door just before feedin' time- HEE-HEE!

[jpshaw]

That would be way too much temptation for me Jainie.

[jglass]

He got her as a companion to a turkey he had for a few years and a few weeks after he got her the male up and died. He thought about taking her back to the farm he bought her from but they would just resell her. Not a good option with Thanksgiving soon.

lol Kev.

[The Ironic Chef]

This has been going around for years but I always get a good laff from it because I know people this could actually work on.

The Pregnant Turkey

Last year at Thanksgiving, my mom went to my sister's house for the traditional feast. Knowing how gullible my sister is, my mom decided to play a trick. She told my sister that she needed something from the store.

When my sister left, my mom took the turkey out of the oven, removed the stuffing, stuffed a Cornish hen, and inserted it into the turkey, and re-stuffed the turkey. She then placed the bird(s) back in the oven.

When it was time for dinner, my sister pulled the turkey out of the oven and proceeded to remove the stuffing. When her serving spoon hit something, she reached in and pulled out the little bird.

With a look of total shock on her face, my mother exclaimed, "Patricia, you've cooked a pregnant bird!" At the reality of this horrifying news, my sister started to cry.

It took the family two hours to convince her that turkeys lay eggs!

[jglass]

That is awesom lol. I read that to Jon and he loved it.

[The Ironic Chef]

We had an old turkey on the farm. The best watch dog (bird) one could ever want. If any one pulled down the driveway, they had to stay in their vehicle until a family member called the bird off.

[jglass]

We used to have an old rooster like that. He loved to come up behind people and peck and scratch them. He tried it on me one day when I was hanging out clothes on the line. I threw the clothes basket and knocked him out of mid air and he never bothered me again. He had my little sister cornered one day and I heard her screaming. My Dad hated that chicken but Mom loved him. I took Mom to town one day and when we pulled back into the driveway Dad had her rooster hanging upside down by his feet from her clothes line. He was getting ready to kill him. Mom flew out of the truck befor I even got it stopped lol. She let her rooster go and told Dad what would happen to him if he ever tried it again.

[scubalaydee]

My mommy had a rooster that was her bodyguard no one came near my mommy unless the rooster checked them out it was truly funny because everywhere my mommy went the rooster was next to her, actually we reared chickens, and of course my mom named all her chickens, we will be sitting in the garden, and my mom will say look who is following us "Rocky", she had a memory like a dictionary, to me all the chickens looked the same unless they had a different color. This bodyguard rooster decided to fight our pet dog Pouchie for my mother's attention, now come on lookin at the size of the dog, and the size of the rooster, who do you think would win? The rooster went down fighting and they became best friends, probably made some kind of animal pact, in animal language, but whatever it was when you visited our home , my mom had a rooster on one side, and a dog on the other. My mom had an uncanny gift of talking to all her animals, she will give out instructions, and they would do it, my mom would say to me would you like a pet chicken choose one, then give instructions and Pouchie will listen then act, he will find the said chicken and gently keep his paws on the chicken for me, amazing it never failed.

[chubbyalaskagriz]

Originally Posted by The Ironic Chef

This has been going around for years but I always get a good laff from it because I know people this could actually work on.

The Pregnant Turkey

Last year at Thanksgiving, my mom went to my sister's house for the traditional feast. Knowing how gullible my sister is, my mom decided to play a trick. She told my sister that she needed something from the store.

When my sister left, my mom took the turkey out of the oven, removed the stuffing, stuffed a Cornish hen, and inserted it into the turkey, and re-stuffed the turkey. She then placed the bird(s) back in the oven.

When it was time for dinner, my sister pulled the turkey out of the oven and proceeded to remove the stuffing. When her serving spoon hit something, she reached in and pulled out the little bird.

With a look of total shock on her face, my mother exclaimed, "Patricia, you've cooked a pregnant bird!" At the reality of this horrifying news, my sister started to cry.

It took the family two hours to convince her that turkeys lay eggs!

Hilarious, IC!

I once read the quote of a little girl... She said: "I liked the taste of the turkey- but I liked the taste of the bread he ate even better!"