It sounds as if you are between the devil and the deep blue sea and I do feel compassion for you as a close relative of mine is an alcoholic. She has been dried out in clinics 3 times now binging for the fourth time.

I don't want to seem pious but my husband and I drink very little. I might have half a glass of wine with Christmas lunch and I did have half a glass of champagne when my son moved into his new home earlier in the year. I have no gripe with people having a drink and being merry. It is just not for me.

I feel compassion for drunks but not for drunken drivers. I believe it is an illness like everything else but to intentionally get into a car knowing full well they are not only over the limit but to drunk to walk and talk properly. They are driving a lethal weapon for goodness sake.

The Criminal Justice System is quite strict on drunken drivers in the UK. It is almost automatic for a year ban, sometimes 2 years, a year in prison and a very hefty fine. Of course it is difficult to get car insurance after a person has been found guilty, even if they can the premiums are through the roof.

In the UK an alcoholic can claim invalidity benefit from the state if they a have been diagnosed as an alcoholic by a psychiatrist. I also believe but not sure, that they get all their prescriptions free. They also get extra benefit to feed their habit, which I think is not the right way to go about it, but there you are I don't make the rules here.

It is a dreadful disease, it ruins not only one life but every other life it touches, never mind how slightly.

I hope that your chum can pull himself together and become dry, otherwise his life is wasted, but by what you have said it sounds highly unlikely.

The US could learn a lot from the UK on both their judical system when dealing with drunk drivers and definately when it comes to medical care and coverage.
The only thing at this point that concerns me is that he will get back behind the wheel and the stress he puts on his folks who are good people. No one dererves to be hurt or killed because of his addiction. His Mama is the adorable little Thai woman. She followed me to the car the other night giving me garlic from her garden plus half a big watermelon and mint. Super sweet lady.

Keziah, I share many of your views regarding alcohol. It perplexes me and I am torn. On the one hand, I myself don't NEED it. I go months (maybe YEARS) without it. Never can even complete two drinks when I do partake. (Funny- my friends laugh at me and call me a "light-weight"! I can drink ONE beer- maybe start a second one, but can never finsih it.) And then others are SO plagued by it they need it constantly. It's a difficult thing to fathom. Intellectually I know it's a disease, and not being a vicitim to the disease is a blessing. And those who are victimized by the disease cannot help it. But still, I always revert back to that thought of personal responsibility. I try not to judge... but it's so difficult. Everyone in an acoholic's life is dreadfully affected by the illness- and also many unwilling strangers- such a tragedy.

I am one who is obese- very overweight, so one would think I could better empathize w/ the factors surrounding addicition and alcoholism. I guess these shortcomings are just personal flaws that I must try to better work at.

I have no problem what so ever with someone drinking. I buy Jon and six pack of his favorite beer occasionally and I love the taste of Amaretto liqueur. In the winter I sometimes add peppermint schnapps or amaretto to my hot chocolate. They are good in milkshakes to lol :o
Check out my fridge and you would think I drank. One shelf is lined with sherry, red wine, pinot grigio & chardonnay.

Very occasionally during the winter I will have a marshmallow and Tia Maria hot chocolate drink. (Ah Yum and very warming)

I would like to know what turns a heavy social drinker into an alcoholic? There must be something? In my professional working life I have come across many people who have had to give up alcohol for health reasons and have had no trouble stopping the consumption of alcohol. I often wonder what causes the actual addiction, when is the point of no return?

Also I hate to contradict but you can't possibly equate being fat to being an alcoholic.

Your have to eat, you do not have to drink alcohol or take illegal drugs. The problem is over eating, that is the diffuculty.

Can you imagine how difficult it would be to tell an alcoholic you can drink but only 3 small drinks a day, or telling a heroin addict you can only have a small amount of your drug. They would never give it up.

If fat people could give up food completely and stay alive, there would be no fat people. The trouble is human beings need food to convert to sugars to stay alive. There is no one solution because every person is different. Each person has to find his/her own way.