please do not let anyone make you feel bad about heaviness. No, you did not blame anyone, but it could be a gene. My youngest daughter has been through so much misery because she is very heavy. A beautiful girl, so talented, yet she has allowed these "SKINNIES" to make her feel less of a person, and still does. She has more going for her than they ever will. And I am sure you do also. You are a dear, and don't you ever forget it, my friend.

Thanks, Ms Mai. How sweet.

Being fat is a whacko, complex thing. And it's different for everybody. I was born lite- about 6 lbs... and since about age 4 I've been overweight.

But to simplify it (or else I could go on and one forever...)- for me, I just figure, everyone has SOME issue. Be it addiction to coffee, smokes, drugs, sex, etc. I guess all in all, at least most fat folks can still hold jobs and function socially! Not trying to reduce it to something completely benign & innocent, 'cause we all know it has a serious side, but really, I just decided long ago that it's not something I wish to cry about any longer.

At least I'm not alone in the dilemma... some mighty fine folks are super-sized!

And in the meantime, I take it day-by-day... some days I'm good- some days I'm not so good...

a lot of weight since by-pass heart surgery and should have been going the other way in pounds. I am a foodie, love to cook and love to eat. I do my best but sometimes that just isn't enough. I lose and gain, then lose and gain. But, ya' know what, I am a good person, try to serve the Lord, have a lovier face and hair than most and under this heaviness I have a shape that would knock their eyes out. I was born under 2# and almost didn't make it. I was always encouraged to eat. ALWAYS!

Was doing good until my late 30's, stayed around a size 10, then started gaining so spent a lot of time dieting. I watch the intake of sat fat because of my heart condition and have the South Beach Diet Book right here beside me. I do well some days other times I just lose it and start to eat the good stuff. I am happy and I know that you are too. Do your best and don't worry about the rest, Chubbs. You are precious just the way your are.

Heck, I probably weigh more than both of you. Started for me when I passed 40 and quit smoking (5 pack+/day) that I had started while in Vietnam. I was qualified then to be a Seal in the Navy, but today I would qualify for The Biggest Loser upcoming show if I had a partner. That's the way life is. I don't sweat the bullets and I'm comfortable with the person I am and my friends are comfortable with me. I ignore the ignorant people.

I love "canning" because I can play with food and not eat it. I just finished doing a whole bunch of Beets I got from the Farmers Market last week. Roasted them in the oven, sliced them for the jars and canned them with some nice pickling brine. I did sneak and eat one extra beet but I've learned to limit eating them or I scare myself the next day when I go to the bathroom. When I do get around to eating the products of my labor, they have less salt and sugar than the commercial stuff and taste soooo much better.

Stay happy. We have our feet solidly on the ground.

Thanks again, Ms Mai!

Great post, CanMan!

I could go on and on... I'm fat and wish I weren't. I know I have the power change those circumstances somewhere deep inside- and sometimes I have made temporary changes- but I just can't make it "stick"... so far, anyway.

Hell, according to her latest TV commercials, even Oprah and all her $$$ and resources still suffers and is still plagued by the demons that make her heavy, and prevent her from making lifelong healthy adaptations...

I guess my thing is- I still try and still make the effort... but I'll be damned if I'll ever let myself be shamed into making changes anymore. I realize my value isn't weight-related at all. Self-love, and realizing others still love us is SO important.

Anyway- thanks to all for the kind, generous support.